Last updateTue, 16 Apr 2019 9pm

Chuck Koehler

The Retailer’s Perspective: This and that you probably didn’t know

“This rang is real ‘cause it’s got them holes in it unnerneath the diamonds so the light can git through,” she said as she was handing me a very cheap, and very worn out, costume ring. You know the kind I’m talking about. The kind of ring that probably looked good the day you bought it at the department store to wear to a party that night. Then you lost it a day or so later and someone found it and thought it was real and has worn it every day for 2 years. Now, the glue that is holding in the ½ of the rhinestones that are left has turned green. The gold plating has worn off and it’s kind of brown in some places and green in others. But it’s got to be real ‘cause it’s got them ‘light holes’ in it.

The Retailer’s Perspective: Terms and Conditions - Part II

I previously wrote about how people will readily click the ‘I agree to these terms and conditions’ on a website without giving it a second thought. That made me think about adding a ‘Terms and Conditions’ waiver that customers must sign before entering my store. After mulling it over for about a year, I’ve come to the conclusion that I left out a few important terms and conditions and now need to amend the document. This is a work-in-progress and might never be finished.

The Retailer’s Perspective: The rude things they do

She sees me eating lunch as she comes through my front door just gabbing away on her phone. Granted, it was only chips and hot dogs, but it was still my lunch. And, they weren’t just any hot dogs, they were special hot dogs. When I’m marinating anything for the grill, I’ll open a package of hot dogs and I’ll pierce them with a fork, and marinate them at the same time. Then I’ll grill them and put them in the fridge to reheat later in the week for lunch.

The Retailer’s Perspective: How to turn a negative into an even bigger negative

A couple of weeks ago, I had a strange situation occur. I had someone come in wanting me to verify an online purchase they made - and I knew them! They were actual customers of mine. Every single time that’s happened in the past, and it’s happened a lot, it’s a total stranger. This was a first and it went something like this.

The Retailer’s Perspective: We need to talk!

As a card carrying member of the jewelry industry, I speak from experience when I say “we need to talk” to my customers. In all reality though, I’m just trying to save them from a very costly lawsuit against me. Because, if we don’t have ‘the talk’ first, they may be foolishly thinking that the thingy they are trying to hand me is actually worth something. Because, when it all goes to hell on my bench, they may actually try to sue me for negligence which is hardly ever true. In most cases, the problem they are bringing to me today started in a faraway land several years ago.

The Retailer’s Perspective: It’s the Hollywood Way

*Opening scene* Neal Lane walks through the sparkling clean jewelry factory, exuding power and authority.  Neal will be wearing a dark blue Armani suit with a red power tie.

*Production Note* This set has been built on soundstage 7. No, we can’t shoot this scene at a real jewelry shop. Have you ever seen how dirty and disorganized those places are? Yuck. We need clean and shiny, just like the real world.

The Retailer’s Perspective: Welcome to 2017!

I saw him get out of his car, walk up the sidewalk, and head towards my front door. I knew right where this one was heading. I could see a watch in one hand, and a watch battery in the other. I could tell what it was because it was in that oversized blister pack you get if you buy a single watch battery at Walmart instead of at my store. And, to make matters even worse, I had just sat down to my lunch of caramelized onion and cream cheese chicken enchiladas. I hadn’t even taken my first bite yet!